Friday, July 23, 2010


Yesterday was mostly a day for licking our wounds and planning... well, and avoiding an ambush set up by NuCoal. But really, what kind of a game is it for us without an ambush of some sort? Despite spilling a cup full of hot chocolate on my notes and character sheet (it's not really a character sheet until it's got food stains on it), I managed to salvage most of the lines of the night, and that's the important thing.

[Everyone at the table boggled at this one for a good five seconds.]
Kain (re: Maia): "If she's with us, she's trustworthy."

[Natural consequences of our plotting. Sort of.]
Matt: "You can fake your own abduction and get Stolkholm syndrome."
Georges: "Wouldn't that be narcissism?"

[Oh, Kain, what a tangled web you weave...]
Kain: "Lie? Us? Inconceivable!"

[Maybe not high up on list for Paxton Arms jingles.]
Josh the GM: "Peace River, making money with guns."
Brock: "We make war better."

[It was such a simple plan when it was conceived...]
Brock: "Action one: jump off the sixth-floor balcony. Action two: kill the bad guys."

[Hello, pot? The kettle called and said you're looking black today.]
Brock: "Come on, they'd be crazy to come after me!"

["Winning" is such a strong word. A strong, delusional word.]
Georges: "Are you going to retreat?"
Brock: "What are you talking about? I'm winning!"

[Kain's lessons for negotiating with assailants, part 1.]
Attacker: "Give us Chambers and you can go!"
Kain: "I have a counter-proposal: surrender and we won't kill you."

[Kain's lessons for negotiating with assailants, part 2.]
Georges: "What, he doesn't know the old 'shoot while you parley' trick?"
Brock: "I believe I just improved my negotiating position."

[The puns! Oh, God, the puns!]
Matt: "He's like a pistol Sam-urai."

[Kain's lessons for negotiating with assailants, part 3.]
Kain: "Which one of you is the leader?"
Josh the GM: "The guy--"
Brock: "I shoot the other one."

[It's good to have a plan. I wish we'd thought of one.]
Brock: "We flee in no particular direction."

[From the department of running jokes.]
Doc: "Where vagueness lies, pain ensues."
Ariel: "I still have the stapler, by the way."

[A simple idea: what we steal, the enemy can't use.]
Gade: "They only have armed boats until we get the armed boats."

[Never, never ask questions like this.]
Brock: "How much trouble can they get into during downtime?"

["Think" is such a strong word.]
Kain (to Sam): "I don't think you thought this plan through."

[Way to rub it in the face of the botched NuCoal ambush, Doc.]
Doc: "We're just going to call this mission null and void in terms of... well, effectiveness for one thing..."

[Further from the department of running jokes.]
Josh the GM: "You're not there."
Matt: "'Cause it's inconvenient for you."
Brock: "We're just that meta."

[Sometimes Kain's mind works in strange ways. Okay, maybe it always works in strange ways.]
Sam: "And we killed the rest of the NuCoal team."
Kain: "That was also professional courtesy. They'd have died of embarrassment otherwise."

["Boat" is such a strong word.]
Kain: "You have a boat?"
Gade: "...It's floating."

[Kain's lessons for reading between the lines, part 1.]
Kain: "Is this plan of yours good enough that we should go right now?"
Gade: "Yes."
Sam: "From Gade, that means no."
Kain: "I'd say 50/50."
Sam: "That's fair."

[When it comes to flying planes, it's the little things that'll trip you up.]
Kain: "Are you novice or proficient?"
Gade: "I definitely have the theory down."

[Some see the glass as half-empty, some as half-full.]
Georges: "I'm having a horrible sense of deja vu and it ends badly."
Matt: "On the plus side, we've never done this before, so we have no history of failure."

[Remember what I said about piloting? And the little things?]
Gade: "I can avoid the missiles with my awesome piloting skills!"
Kain: "Let's call that plan B."

["Competence" is such a strong word.]
Gade (defensively): "I read the manual! ...For a completely different model."

[The joys of having only a single rank in piloting.]
Ben: "You know how to fly this, right?"
Gade: "Yeah, yeah."
Ben: "Both hands!"
Gade: "Don't stress me!"

So there we are, 1500 km to our destination on 600 km worth of fuel, an untested pilot, and more than half our party severely wounded. Gee Willikers, I sure do hope nothing goes wrong! (Insert maniacal laughter from our GM here.)


Heavy Josh said...

This stuff kills me.

Sam-urai is awesome.

Hermes 72 - Heavy Gear RPG - Most artwork Copyright 2002 Dream Pod 9, Inc.