Friday, March 10, 2017

Wordslingin'

Side-quest! While Our Heroes (tm) are busy saving the world, Ti has decided to subcontract one of their jobs to a second-rate Northern detail squad. The massive reign of carnage comes free with every data heist. I’m pretty sure that’s in the contract.


Cast of characters for today’s session:

  • Janice (played by Brock): a massive woman, former combat medic, who took a shard of shrapnel in the head and isn't quite as sharp as she once was

  • Joan (played by Julie): a pyromaniac explosives expert with an erratic trigger finger

  • Jane (played by Ariel): A compulsive liar, much better at breaking into secure facilities than she is at telling a convincing lies... we hope

  • Jean (NPC played by Georges the GM): the drug-addicted team lead who claims her specialized skills will not be useful on this job



[We semi-randomly generated the characters for the session, which led to certain… unlikely justifications.]
Georges the GM: “There had to be a reason for all of you to be on the island of misfit agents.”
Julie: “I think I set my old team on fire.”

[Each of us has been separately invited to a massive warehouse, loaded for bear.]
Georges the GM: “You notice each other in this space.”
Brock: “Does it immediately devolve into a shootout?”

[More results of semi-randomly generating the characters.]
Georges the GM: “You’re all women, which doesn’t mean anything except that it happens to be the case.”

[Jean, our team lead, informs us that the job is some data retrieval from a bank about two hours out of town. We’re expecting resistance but hoping to nip it in the bud.]
Jean: “We’re trying to use overwhelming violence here.”
Joan: “Sounds good to me.”

[More from the department of ‘justifications we had to come up with because of the semi-randomly generated characters.’ In this case, why Janice is a medic with a -1 on her knowledge score. Brock justifies this by explaining that she took some shrapnel to the brain.]
Janice: “Before the injury, I was a medic.”
Jean: “You do remember which ones are the veins and which ones are the arteries, right?”
Janice: “Last I checked.”
Joan: “Was that before or after the injury?”
Janice: “I can’t remember. [beat] Nah, I’m fucking with you. Before.”

[In addition to being a brain-damaged medic, Janice is a massive woman with a squad automatic weapon.]
Janice: “Sure, I’ll play chess. I used to be pretty good.”
Ariel: “Is this a ‘let the wookie win’ situation?”

[More delving into our characters and their equipment loadout. Just as Brock had to make some decisions regarding his character to make some of the stats understandable, Julie has decided that Joan, a demolitions expert, is a pyromaniac.]
Julie: “Brock has convinced me to bring a cutting torch.”
Georges the GM: “I’m amazed he hasn’t convinced you to bring a chainsaw.”
Julie: “Chainsaws are heavy… and don’t light things on fire.”

[We reach our destination, open the doors of the armored van in which we have arrived, and see two comparatively bored security guards ready to unload the cargo from the back of the van… where the team is lying in wait.]
Brock: “Two shots, full ROF, because why not.”

[Janice is very effective with her SAW.]
Georges the GM: “There are guys in the security station. One is playing solitaire. They see the two guys go past, then… red mist and limbs falling from the sky.”

[We take out the two guys in the security station with equal efficiency. Jean goes onto the PA system.]
Jean: “There’s no need for violence… or any more violence.”

[We have informed the employees that we will consider anyone we encounter on the way to our destination to be hostile. So when we encounter two more security personnel…]
Georges the GM: “They’re behind a desk.”
Julie: “You know what that screams to me? Grenade.”

[While Jane and Joan throw their grenades, Janice lays down suppressing fire.]
Brock: *rolls 11 on suppressing fire*
Julie: “Has he suppressed them to death?”

[The combination of a flash-bang grenade, a frag grenade, and extremely thorough suppressing fire works about as excellently as you might expect.]
Georges the GM: “Oh, my God, the sequence of carnage here…”

[Reflecting on the op so far.]
Brock: “These raids? A whole different perspective when you can go live-fire.”

[Moving forward, Joan has taken cover in the doorway of an occupied office while we take out some hostiles further down the hallway.]
Office Clerk: *shoots at Joan but misses*
Joan: “Wrong move. I was gonna let you live.”

[More of the same.]
Julie: “I was gonna roll to see whether I killed him, but then he shot me.”
Brock: “He shot the doorframe.”
Julie: “He shot at me.”
Brock: “Near you.”

[We continue to lay down massive amounts of carnage.]
Ariel: “Can this be our next campaign?”

[It doesn’t hurt that our enemies are rolling poorly. Well, it doesn’t hurt us.]
Brock: “These are the unluckiest adversaries we’ve ever fought.”

[More hostiles approaching!]
Julie: “Do I use an incendiary grenade?”
Ariel: “If you don’t set them on fire, I’ll consider it a misfire of Chekov’s gun.”

[We have fifteen minutes to do the job. Achieving our primary objective – and killing almost everyone in the building – has taken about five minutes.]
Jean: “How would you consider a secondary objective?”
Joan: “Being?”
Brock: (as Jean) “Well, the room you just set on fire contains this vital intel.”

[The secondary objective turns out to be a particular stock key.]
Ariel: “Did we just steal Ti’s money?”
Georges the GM: “You just stole… someone’s money.”

[We have killed almost everyone, but not entirely everyone. The final two security guards have holed up in the garage where we must pass.]
Players: *roll very well on initiative*
Georges the GM: “You get the drop on them, despite the fact that they were waiting for us.”

[We deal with the final two guards with our usual level of efficiency.]
Brock: “Shell casings everywhere…”
Georges the GM: “Rivers of blood…”

[Our exfil plan is a hopper that has been sent to meet us.]
Georges the GM: “I won’t keep you in suspense – you’re not murdered by the hopper.”

[Sadly, things start going pear-shaped around this time as our hopper is taken out by a surface-to-air missile.]
Georges the GM: “Big bang, kaboom, ball of fire…”
Joan: “On the one hand, I’m sad we lost our exfil. On the other, that was a really impressive explosion.”

[It looks like whoever shot down the hopper is in a nearby patch of light forest.]
Joan: “You know what I’ve always wanted to do? Light a forest on fire.”

[After some harrowing moments, we take out the hostiles. Sadly, our van is very recognizable and we must walk most of the way back to town. We spend the time exchanging back-story information.]
Georges the GM: “Jean spent a fair amount of time in a hellish place in the ESE.”
Brock: “Like all places in the ESE.”




Heavy Gear Roleplaying Game

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