Friday, June 8, 2012

Wordslingin'

Last night session saw the successful completion of "Operation: Access the Ridiculously Inaccessible Computer." Well, more or less. The good news is that we managed to get the information we needed out of the ridiculously inaccessible computer without anyone being the wiser. The bad news is that our operation was interrupted by another group of mercs whose mission was to destroy the computer we were in the process of hacking. And the session ended with someone tasering an ostrich and punching out a dwarf. Because every game needs its David Lynch moments, I suppose.

[The moment when you know the plan has taken an unexpected turn.]
Lukas: "I think what we need is a stripper."

[We infiltrate the hall of records as maintenance people. Naturally, the vault has no actual scheduled maintenance, but little details like that have never stopped Lukas before.]
Ariel: "I think this campaign is just a series of jobs that Lukas is better at than his actual job."

[As we finish downloading the data we need from the ridiculously inaccessible computer, the vault wall bursts open and large, armed men rush in. The vault's attendant archivist, Shirley Bental, rushes to shut the door.]
Guard: "What are you doing?!"
Shirley Bental: "Blocking them in."
Lyta: "There's a gigantic hole in the wall!"
Shirley Bental: "Keeping them from us, then."
Lyta: "...Point."

[It turns out that not only are there armed mercs in the vault, but there are also armed mercs in much of the rest of the building, preventing our attempts at a sneaky escape.]
Brock: "I roll boxcars on my efforts to incite panic."
Ariel: "I get panicked and run."

[We discover that the head of the rival merc team is our old pal Pinky. He wants to get together for cawfee, to see if he can buy our information off us. We attempt to convince him that he interrupted us before we could get anything.]
Pinky: "You went in for somethin' and got nothin'?"
Lukas: "We might have been interrupted by an ill-timed exploding wall."

[Pinky is not a subtle creature.]
Pinky: "Would it be indiscreet to... Hell, it would be indiscreet, but could you tell me anyway what you were after?"

[Pinky wants us to go to a kinky sex club.]
Pinky: (to Lyta) "What are you wearing?"
Lukas: "Oh, you'll like it."
Lyta: (to Lukas) "You are so lucky I trust you."

[Before going to the kinky sex club, we stop off at a local merc bar for drinks.]
Georges the GM: "Everyone has the posture, the composure. Everyone looks like... they have 2 initiative."

[It turns out what we thought was a kinky sex club is in fact some sort of underground lounge featuring live wild animals roaming free between tables where patrons drink champagne and play chess. Pinky is... disappointed.]
Pinky: "Have you ever punched out an ostrich?"
Lyta: "No. Have you?"
Pinky: "No. But tonight's the night!"

[Pinky punches an ostrich. People start to panic. Lyta punches a random guy in frustration.]
Georges the GM: "People are freaking out."
Julie: "Well, I guess we're not getting invited back."

And that's it for this week. Next week, we follow Pinky to Khayr Ad-Din for an infiltration/recon job, with the secondary objective of figuring out who Pinky is working for. And, hopefully, no more ostriches.





Heavy Gear Roleplaying Game

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