Friday, January 27, 2012

Wordslingin'

Who you gonna call? Gangbusters! Yesterday's session saw Our Heroes (tm) beat up a local gang who were terrorizing some townsfolk and narrowly avoided a firefight with the gang leader's robber baron uncle. In the end, we came away with a little more money, one extra jeep, and no extra wounds! Huzzah!

[On a caravan to Lance Point, one of the longrunners breaks down and we don't have the spare part to fix it. The caravan boss, Fanny, agrees that the PCs and Ti can go to a nearby town to see if they have parts.]
Lyta: "Is Fanny giving us money to buy the part?"
Lukas: "Excellent question, Lyta. You're hereby promoted to collections!"

[Sometimes travel in the desert is primitive. Sometimes, less so.]
Georges the GM: "We're having fresh-baked goods in the desert."
Julie: "We can bake on the backs of the armadillos!"
Georges the GM: "...Or in a solar oven."

[On the outskirts of town, we run into a woman named Maggie who's tending to her herd of springers. She's not taking very well to being startled by strangers.]
Maggie: "Do I look like I have a longerunner part?"
Lukas: "Well, not up under your skirts."
Maggie: "You watch your tongue, face-man."

[Fanny has given us double the market price for the longrunner part. However, Lukas drives a good deal with the local hardware dealer and gets it for 25% off.]
Ariel: "He's gonna tell Fanny he asked for market price and keep the rest of the money."
Brock: "Are you kidding? He drove a hard bargain and took the whole thing!"

[As we're finishing up dealing with the local general store owner, a half-dozen ruffians enter stage left.]
Lyta: "We gonna have to beat these guys up?"
Lukas: "Yeah."

[We consider the tactical situation.]
Lyta: "If we knock them out, we can drive their motorcycles back."
Lukas: "That's true."

[The local general store owner's name is Constantine Feller.]
Sun Fau, gang leader: "You're like a feller, but yer name is Feller! Ha!"

[Sun Fau tries to interfere in our business negotiations.]
Sun Fau: "Whatever they're offerin' -- which I reckon is nothing' -- I'll offer you twice that!"

[After trying to circumvent our acquisition of the longrunner part, Sun Fau offers to pay Lukas for an hour with Lyta. Lukas agrees and starts haggling for price. Naturally, he knows precisely what's going to happen when Lyta gets Sun Fau alone, but Sun Fau is completely oblivious.]
Lukas: "If she doesn't completely blow you away, I'll give you all your money back."

[After bringing Sun Fau to the basement and knocking him out, Lyta does the same with one of his underlings. The four remaining thugs are running low on money, but yet still want to have their turn.]
Lukas: "We're gonna have a bit of a game, and whoever wins can be next with my sister."
Thug #3: "That's your sister?! You're a cold son of a bitch!"

[The game Lukas suggests to the heavily inebriated thugs is a variant on William Tell, with cawfee mugs instead of apples and guns instead of arrows. Two of the thugs simply fall down, too drunk to play, but another gets a shot off right next to his companion's face.]
Thug #5: "Damn! I think I could'a got hurt!"

[Having discovered that Sun Fau is in fact the nephew of a local magnate, we decide to tie up all the thugs and ride them out of the city so the townspeople aren't implicated. They are less than entirely appreciative, given that this might cause them problems with the magnate.]
Lukas: "Can't do a favor for anyone these days!"

[Apparently us beating up and incapacitating all the thugs was entirely unexpected to Georges the GM.]
Georges the GM: "We're gonna skip right over chapters two and three. I'm gonna have to wing it."

[Returning to Maggie's homestead, Torgath avoids her two youngish sons.]
Ariel: "Jocks scare me."
Julie: "Your sister is a jock."
Ariel: "Yeah, you scare me too."
Julie: "...That's fair."

[Torgath sneaks into Maggie's homestead, very much startling her and Ti. You'd think he doesn't trust us or something.]
Torgath: (rushed) "Time to go."
Ti Corovan: "...Tell me exactly what you've done."

[Toragth relates the morning's adventures in his own unique way.]
Ti Corovan: "Lyta slept with the hooligans?!"

[We give a significant amount of money to Maggie so that she can avoid being evicted by Sun Fau's uncle.]
Ti Corovan: "Where did Lukas get the money?"
Torgath: "From selling Lyta to the hooligans."
Ti Corovan: *boggles*

[An hour or so later, Ti and Lyta find themselves traveling together to return the longrunner part to the caravan. Ti finally confronts Lyta on what Torgath told him.]
Ti Corovan: "He told me things no one could invent."
Lyta: "Oh, you'd be surprised at Torgath's imagination."

[Meanwhile, Lukas and Torgath have been pursued by a group of men who turn out to be Sun Fau's uncle, Kashin Borno, and about a dozen of his armed men. Lukas and Torgath take refuge in a mine entrance. Lukas tries to negotiate.]
Borno: "I don't think you should be arguing with a guy who's got him ten guys with big guns."
Lukas: "You make an excellent point, but I've got a hovertank tucked in here."

[Lukas is trying to negotiate with Borno without actually tipping his hand.]
Lukas: "I ain't killed any of your boys yet... if'n I had 'em... hypothetical-like."

[Borno comes to entirely the wrong conclusion as to why we have his nephew.]
Borno: "This sorta thing leads a man to assume you're tryin' to get some money outta me."
Julie: "Quick! Get some money out of him!"

[Lyta and Ti have taken up position near Borno's car, where they're in a standoff against four of Borno's men. Torgath, meanwhile, is leading the four armadillos and all our prisoners to an alternate mine entrance, leaving Lukas alone at the mouth of the mine.]
Ti Corovan: "If it comes down to it, on our side, I'm pretty sure we can cut 'em down."
Lukas: "Yeah, but I've got seven guys here. I'm not so confident."

[Borno steps forward, unarmed, to negotiate in good faith.]
Lukas: "Seems like I'm pretty close to having two hostages here."
Borno: "Who you gonna negotiate with, then?"

[Recall that before the war, Lukas, Lyta, and to a lesser extent Torgath were all part of Baja's upper-crust elite.]
Ariel: "There are no good land barons. They're all evil."
Brock: "How do you think our parents got rich!?"

[Torgath failed his handle animal rolls in the tunnels, so that when he emerges from the mine, he only has three armadillos, not the four we were expecting.]
Lyta: "Where's the last armadillo?"
Toragth: "It's complicated."
Lyta: "You lost it?!"


And that's it for this week. Next week, hopefully we'll all be on the road again to Lance Point, and from there to Mainz or Junira Loresh. Unless, of course, something else goes wrong. But what are the chances of that happening?



Heavy Gear Roleplaying Game

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